I'm really looking forward to Christmas. I've made a plan of how I'm going to manage it, pacing everything out so that I can enjoy it as much as possible. I'm going to try and manage without my carers on Christmas Day and Boxing Day too; obviously it's their Christmas too, so they've probably got better things to do than come and sort me out. And I also have every intention of going downstairs still (more about that in a minute) so I won't need them to bring up my medication and other things like that. I'm really looking forward to just doing 'normal' things like eating downstairs so so much. It feels like an absolute age ago that I was doing those sorts of things, so it'll be really special! It might sound really sad, but I'm really looking forward to watching the Downton Abbey Christmas special. I do love Downton, and because usually I'm not able to watch the TV because of my noise and light sensitivity even if I can watch a few minutes that'll be a nice treat! I've hinted for series one and two on DVD for Christmas, so I suppose we'll just have to wait and see what Santa brings...My physio and social worker came back to visit me this morning and it went really well for one very big reason- they really listened and understood what I was saying. They were actually pretty shocked that I'd been told by the doctor that everyone needed to be hard on me and push me beyond my limits. And they also acknowledged that this is all going to take time; it's not going to help me if I'm rushed into doing things, desperate as I am to get better. It felt like such a massive weight off my shoulders; I felt like there was someone to stick up for me and help me beat this rather than assume that if I'm not pushing myself really hard, I don't want to get better. I told them that I'll be going downstairs for Christmas too. They said that they couldn't recommend it, but I think it was one of those 'I won't tell if you don't' situations. In reality, I'm not ready to go down there just yet. I certainly won't be walking down there. But I think Abi (my physio) realised that it'll absolutely make my Christmas if I'm downstairs! Sometimes you have to put your emotional side first. I probably will feel worse physically for doing it, but I'll feel a lot worse emotionally for staying in my room.
I've been smiling an awful lot today though- people have been sending and bringing round presents, and in line with my plan to pace Christmas I've opened a few! Last night my really close friend Dawn came round with her boyfriend, Craig. We swapped presents- she'd really spoilt me! She gave me a gorgeous bubble bath set (which as soon as I'm well enough to have a bath again I'll be using!) and a box set of three
Adam Sandler films. I also got some presents through the post this morning which I couldn't resist opening. I just saw it as a reward for doing my physio. One of my friends sent me a sixteen month calendar with loads of positive, motivational sayings in which was really lovely; it's full of nice bright colours and little doodles too so that's gone straight up on my wall! Kat (who runs the AYME Somerset local contact group and who went to college with me) sent me a monkey that she'd made out of long stripy socks. He's so cute. I haven't given him a name yet but I'm thinking of one! He's very ME friendly too- very huggable with nice long arms and legs that I can wrap around my neck. And he's very good for touch sensitivity, so I've finally been getting that hug I've wanted for so long!We've just found out too that Rob's got a job! He's going to be working with the Virgin Formula 1 team doing the aerodynamics or something like that on their car. I'm so proud of him. He's going to need to move to Banbury for it though, I'll miss him like mad. But I'm so pleased for him.
No comments:
Post a Comment